It’s funny how much of a bad rap marriage gets. I guess i can understand when we see how poorly executed it has been by those before us. But our generation isn't on the the golden road either. We are a “commitment-less” generation of people coming up the ranks. Our parents decided to shake it up and make love free in ’69 and for forty years we’ve been walking in the wilderness of selfish me first relationships, bound to have a not so pretty ending. So where’s the love? Ya know, true love? The kind that lasts a lifetime? The kind that satisfies the greatest desire?
Well, I’m a hopeful person. I asked for a Lions Jersey last Christmas and wouldn’t you know that’s one of the few things that landed under the tree with my name on it. (Thx Scooter and Lolo ☺) This was the beginning to a bold declaration that I was no longer going to be a closet Detroit Lions fan, but have a little faith in their future. This little hope that I have doesn’t come from thin air, there’s actually been a radical change in the direction of the organization/players and some of the things they’ve shown have been inspiring to believe that something is different. We might have a future in our relationship as players and fans.
I’m a hopeful person when it comes to love too, but beyond that, I know love works. No new jerseys needed here to show it, although my wife wearing my Calvin Johnson (#81) jersey could have a very happy ending. ☺ sorry… I got distracted for a moment… … jokes aside, I emphatically choose it. Not feel it. Not hope i fall into it. I choose it, cause Love is a choice. Everyday I reinforce my love for her with considering her in all my decisions. What is sacrificed in commitment (let’s be real, relationships are hard work!), is more than gained thru companionship. The need for love is so powerful. It’s in our DNA. God designed us with love as the single most conscious and subconscious need that we have. Some would argue that money or knowledge would be contenders, but isn’t the drive of those things there simply to build the perception of those around us as higher? (we really do care what people think). It still comes back to receiving varying versions of love from those around us healthy or unhealthy aside.
Back to football… Watching the Lions vs. Bears in their week one opener was really inspiring. The bears had pretty much had their way with pushing the ball down field and had arrived at the 1 yard line. After three attempts to get the ball in the endzone and failing, they decided to go for it on fourth down. (if they don’t make it, they lose the ball and it’s a potential game losing decision as well) The OLD lions would have just laid over and let them score. The NEW lions had somethin’ to say. NOT IN THIS HOUSE! The players had a mindset change and stopped them from scoring. While they lost that game anyways, these small victories are paving the way for a winning future. A change from thinking about who they used to be as a losing organization to really focus on who they can become as a team but even beyond that- what if they were thinking about who they were playing for? I think it really resonated with fans because for many years they’ve been in a “football wilderness” so to speak. As a losing franchise, fans have waited for the chance to be proud to wear a jersey, ball cap or maybe even go to a game and cheer them on. That’s a novel idea. Needless to say, these small victories are paving they way that the team really wants to make this relationship with fans work. They need the fans. The fans need them.
Over the last 8 years of my marriage to Melissa, there were times I looked back to the history of learning how to love selflessly and making incomplete decisions with myself in mind more that anyone else, and was discouraged to believe in my future. Honestly speaking… I woke a few mornings and asked myself “What did you get yourself into?!” It’s funny how our emotions can try to intervene and eliminate the foundation of love which is commitment. Commitment affords you the chance to see that love (when supported with selflessness) is still alive! It can always be cultivated, if we choose to do it. Maybe if we chose to do this more, our fans (spouses) would wear our jersey, ball cap, or who knows… maybe actually show up to the game to cheer us on. That’s a novel idea. I need my wife. She needs me.
Watching football as cheesy as it may be, was a great reminder of the NEW choices I’ve made over the last few years and that was to believe in my future because of what it’s intended to be. Marriage or even love in general was intended to be good. That means there is a way that makes it work and have a great ending. It’s God’s way. It starts with thinking differently about our future, and then investing accordingly. Here a little and there a little. In football small victories (like stopping them on 4th and Goal) yield winning attitudes, in love small investments of selflessness yield winning relationships. The bible says the two shall become one flesh. When your spouse wins, you win. If you make them lose, you lose.
It’s 4th and Goal and it takes two to tango right? So why not give your spouse something to cheer about? Be selfless, be committed… be conscious of your companionship, the need you have to be loved and your companions ability to fulfill that need. It’s possible. Who knows… it may even work for the Lions.
Well, I’m a hopeful person. I asked for a Lions Jersey last Christmas and wouldn’t you know that’s one of the few things that landed under the tree with my name on it. (Thx Scooter and Lolo ☺) This was the beginning to a bold declaration that I was no longer going to be a closet Detroit Lions fan, but have a little faith in their future. This little hope that I have doesn’t come from thin air, there’s actually been a radical change in the direction of the organization/players and some of the things they’ve shown have been inspiring to believe that something is different. We might have a future in our relationship as players and fans.
I’m a hopeful person when it comes to love too, but beyond that, I know love works. No new jerseys needed here to show it, although my wife wearing my Calvin Johnson (#81) jersey could have a very happy ending. ☺ sorry… I got distracted for a moment… … jokes aside, I emphatically choose it. Not feel it. Not hope i fall into it. I choose it, cause Love is a choice. Everyday I reinforce my love for her with considering her in all my decisions. What is sacrificed in commitment (let’s be real, relationships are hard work!), is more than gained thru companionship. The need for love is so powerful. It’s in our DNA. God designed us with love as the single most conscious and subconscious need that we have. Some would argue that money or knowledge would be contenders, but isn’t the drive of those things there simply to build the perception of those around us as higher? (we really do care what people think). It still comes back to receiving varying versions of love from those around us healthy or unhealthy aside.
Back to football… Watching the Lions vs. Bears in their week one opener was really inspiring. The bears had pretty much had their way with pushing the ball down field and had arrived at the 1 yard line. After three attempts to get the ball in the endzone and failing, they decided to go for it on fourth down. (if they don’t make it, they lose the ball and it’s a potential game losing decision as well) The OLD lions would have just laid over and let them score. The NEW lions had somethin’ to say. NOT IN THIS HOUSE! The players had a mindset change and stopped them from scoring. While they lost that game anyways, these small victories are paving the way for a winning future. A change from thinking about who they used to be as a losing organization to really focus on who they can become as a team but even beyond that- what if they were thinking about who they were playing for? I think it really resonated with fans because for many years they’ve been in a “football wilderness” so to speak. As a losing franchise, fans have waited for the chance to be proud to wear a jersey, ball cap or maybe even go to a game and cheer them on. That’s a novel idea. Needless to say, these small victories are paving they way that the team really wants to make this relationship with fans work. They need the fans. The fans need them.
Over the last 8 years of my marriage to Melissa, there were times I looked back to the history of learning how to love selflessly and making incomplete decisions with myself in mind more that anyone else, and was discouraged to believe in my future. Honestly speaking… I woke a few mornings and asked myself “What did you get yourself into?!” It’s funny how our emotions can try to intervene and eliminate the foundation of love which is commitment. Commitment affords you the chance to see that love (when supported with selflessness) is still alive! It can always be cultivated, if we choose to do it. Maybe if we chose to do this more, our fans (spouses) would wear our jersey, ball cap, or who knows… maybe actually show up to the game to cheer us on. That’s a novel idea. I need my wife. She needs me.
Watching football as cheesy as it may be, was a great reminder of the NEW choices I’ve made over the last few years and that was to believe in my future because of what it’s intended to be. Marriage or even love in general was intended to be good. That means there is a way that makes it work and have a great ending. It’s God’s way. It starts with thinking differently about our future, and then investing accordingly. Here a little and there a little. In football small victories (like stopping them on 4th and Goal) yield winning attitudes, in love small investments of selflessness yield winning relationships. The bible says the two shall become one flesh. When your spouse wins, you win. If you make them lose, you lose.
It’s 4th and Goal and it takes two to tango right? So why not give your spouse something to cheer about? Be selfless, be committed… be conscious of your companionship, the need you have to be loved and your companions ability to fulfill that need. It’s possible. Who knows… it may even work for the Lions.
